Today I was sitting at my desk looking at my little collection of small gifts from all over the world from friends and family – a tiny gold bird from Ghana, a handwritten postcard from my favorite manor in England, a red and black Russian nesting doll, a special sign from California, a bright blue flower from Sevilla’s Feria de Abril, and a hand-painted boomerang from Australia. I’m lucky to have jet-setting friends all over the world, but it means that half of my favorite people are always thousands of miles away. The holiday season sometimes makes that distance seem even longer and the twinge of homesickness slightly sharper.
The holidays at home in California
Barcelona’s holiday lights have been switched on for a week now, so I’ve been feeling extra-festive. But the holidays are always a little tricky abroad. Living in another country often feels like you’re being tugged in two totally opposite directions all the time (check out Christine in Spain’s great post on The Expat Dilemma). It’s tough balancing out how much I like living in Barcelona with all the people I love here…and how nice it would be to live in California near all the people I love there. The holidays are one of those times that makes it achingly obvious that there’s no clear or easy answer as to where I’d rather be.
The holidays in Barcelona.
Thanksgiving is a great chance to bring together, if not all the people, at least some of the fun and traditions from one country to share. It’s a pretty easy sell for my friends here – sharing a delicious meal with your friends is a pretty universally liked thing. Last year, I hosted a big dinner for friends from all over the world, including Spain, Turkey, France, Germany, South Korea, and the U.S. Everyone went round the table and said what they were thankful for, and we finished off the night by hitting the clubs until 6 a.m. to go out with a bang.
The dinner last year…before we added more people for a party!
This year, I had dinner with a small group of American and Catalan friends with equal success. Part of the fun of sharing traditions and holidays from your home country is mixing and mashing them up with the local culture. This year, we had butifarra sausages instead of a roast turkey, and poured creamy aioli instead of gravy on our roasted potatoes.
But it goes beyond just food. Verbalizing things that you’re grateful for made us acknowledge how fortunate we are to travel and meet all kinds of fascinating people. At my ‘Friendsgivings’, everyone has been thankful for similar things – friends, family, travel, and getting to live somewhere they love – even when we’re from wildly different places and very different backgrounds.
Image credit: Girl Gone International (my favorite quote right now)
Sharing a tradition that’s so different also opens up a fun conversation about some of the just plain ridiculous things about each culture. Black Friday sales? Madness…but have you seen the fighting grannies in the rebajas crowds in Spain? Over-the-top American holiday celebrations? Those were deemed silly, but fun. And the Catalan holiday tradition of the Caga Tio, the grinning log that poos out presents, took the crown for the weirdest holiday tradition. Seeing your “normal” from a different perspective is hilariously eye-opening from both sides, and re-thinking what’s normal is really one of the best rewards of travel.
So while celebrating the holidays abroad is definitely bittersweet, it’s lovely to sit down and recognize that even though it’s hard to live so far away from your friends and family, making new friends abroad and creating your own mixed-up international traditions is a great way of bringing a tiny piece of home with you on your travels.
And it doesn’t take up any of your baggage weight allowance either.
Happy holidays, everyone!
-Jess
The lights in Barcelona are so beautiful! They don’t turn them on in Logroño until December 6th. Thanks for the post, I’m having similar feelings. Happy Holidays!!
Courtney recently posted…An Auxiliar Thanksgiving
Same to you! Enjoy your holiday lights tomorrow. 🙂 It’s so much fun to see the cities lit up for the holidays.
Great account of how difficult it can be to spend the holidays abroad! I spent a Thanksgiving in Barcelona a few years ago and while it was challenging to be away from family and friends at home, it was nice to have a “Friendsgiving” and not lose sight what we were thankful for. The Christmas lights in Barcelona are some of my favorites. Hoping to get back there during the holidays soon!
Bridget @ A Traveling B recently posted…Sunday Snapshot: Cliffs of Moher
Thanks Bridget! Friendsgivings are nice, and it’s always good to remember everything you have to be thankful for.
I feel the same way. It is a juggling act and can be so hard to be away from home during this time. It’ll be even stranger for me this year since I’ll neither be in Spain or the U.S., but in England visiting my boyfriend’s family instead. I know the celebrations are different there than in California and though it might be weird for me, I’m still pretty excited. Besides, in California we don’t really get all that cold, wintery festiveness like in Europe. That will be cool to experience!
Sounds like you had a great Thanksgiving though! Hope you have a non-homesicknessy fun holiday season!
Jessica Wray recently posted…My New Project in Madrid
That will be different! I’m not sure how an English Christmas will be different for you, but I do know that my English/living in California family always has a lovely time during the holidays, and I hope you will too. 🙂 Have fun celebrating!
Honestly though, I can do without cold winters! It looks pretty, but I hate how it feels. 😀
Oh my goodness, California looks beautiful, as does Spain. It looks like you are going to have a wonderful holiday season no matter where you are!
Happy Holidays!
Blakeley AeroSea recently posted…dreaming of a french road trip
This is true, I’m very lucky! My hometown in California, Riverside, has a special Festival of Lights during the holidays and it really is beautiful. It’s not famous for much else, but the lights are great. 🙂
So true that it is bittersweet to be celebrating the holidays away from your family, and I am no stranger to the idea, had 2 Thanksgivings in the last 4 years away, including just this recent one. What I do is to just keep myself busy and join friends who invited me to celebrate with them. I love getting to experience the Holiday “their” way, and learn something new, and being thankful it.
Sarah recently posted…Amalfi Coast
Yes, that’s a good idea! It’s always fun to see how other people do the holidays, and it’s great to keep social instead of staying in.
Great post! I feel like we (everyone) are always evolving, and part of our evolution is appreciating the past and embracing new things as we go along. This is especially important for expats or full-time travelers. Neither of us have ever been huge on holidays, but we do appreciate the family-togetherness and the traditions of our past. It’s something we all sort of give up in order to follow our dreams, and people who cannot do that are ones that usually have serious issues with homesickness and/or eventually go back to wherever they came from. There’s nothing wrong with that, per se, it’s just sort of how it is. Everyone sort of has a duty to create their own traditions for their own family, whether in their homeland or abroad. E.g. your sister’s traditions will be a bit different than her/your parents’, etc. And what you – or others like you and us – do on holidays from our homelands is just that evolution from our old traditions to new ones. And a lot of that (not all, of course) is how it would be no matter where we/you are.
I might miss the family time that we used to have back in the States, but having friends over for dinner on Thanksgiving is nice and something to cherish. While I think fondly of past traditions, or ones that are carried on by my family so many thousands of miles away, I tend to focus more on the good things and there here/now of what’s happening on that day where I am. And that is an enjoyable dinner with friends and the blessing of being able to be where we are, doing what we love.
Ryan from Jets Like Taxis recently posted…Language Learning: What Do You Use?
Thanks, Ryan! It’s true, appreciating the past and embracing the new is a big part of traveling or living abroad. It’s nice to bring a little piece of that with you, and it’s good to recognize and cherish how lucky we are to get to travel and do this sort of stuff.
Hope you’re enjoying the holiday season so far!
Indeed. Thanks Jessica!
Ryan from Jets Like Taxis recently posted…New On the Site: Have Us Come to Your City!
It certainly seems as though you’ve been able to make the best out of being separated from friends and family during the holidays. Your “friendsgiving” parties sound like a lot of fun. And to do it in Barcelona, well that’s a treat in itself. I’d love to go there someday! Happy Holidays to you!
Jackie Cangro recently posted…The One with All the Christmas Lights
Exactly, it’s lovely to be in Barcelona during the holidays. 🙂 Happy holidays to you as well!
I love the quoted. I actually shared it the other day on our Facebook fanpage!
I can really relate to this post. I spend almost every Christmas, Easter and major holidays abroad, away from my friends and family. On one hand I am happy to be experiencing something different in a new country, but on the other hand I miss everyone like crazy. I’m spending this Christmas in China with no snow, but hope to talk to everyone on Skype :).
Agness recently posted…Finding My Passion For Yoga In China
It’s a very good quote! Enjoy your Christmas in China without snow. It’s funny, a Christmas WITH snow for me would be more unusual! 🙂
As a brit I never really encountered nor understood Thanksgiving until I came to Spain and met some Americans. It is such a huge deal for them, and its awesome that they (or you?) go to such lengths to make it extra special instead of miserable as they’re (you’re?) so far away from home. Looks as though you make a great hostess!
Happy belated Thanksgiving Jess!
Hmm…it’s not that it’s such a big deal for me as a tradition, but it’s a nice, easy one to share with people (free food and booze is a great combination). The thing that is special is that it marks the official start of the holiday season and most of my friends get to go home to celebrate, so that makes me feel a bit homesick every year.
Beautifully written! I always seemed to be living abroad during the first half of the year until I spent my first ever Thanksgiving outside of the US when I was living in Mexico. However, I had the flu and was not able to partake in the local expats Thanksgiving supper which was most disappointing 🙁 But whatever the holiday is, when you’re away from “home” and all that comes with it can be sad but sometimes making new holiday traditions and sharing your country’s holiday with others is just as memorable and enjoyable!
Hope you had a lovely Thanksgiving on your side of the pond 🙂
Julie recently posted…Restaurant Review-Paris 66 (Pittsburgh, PA)
Exactly! It’s fun mixing and mashing traditional holidays to make your own new ones abroad. 🙂
Jessica, you nailed how I feel most of the time–being torn between two countries. My Spanish family feels like family to me. After finally visiting their country last summer the longing feels worse. Being back in the States, when a holiday like Thanksgiving comes around it makes me miss having my Spanish family with me here. I am so thankful that I get to have families in two countries to love and can call two countries my home. The cost, as the quote image so aptly implies, is the heartache that you have to live with.
Ardis recently posted…A Grief That Can’t be Spoken
Yes, it’s so hard! It’s a nice kind of hard because we get double the family and friends, but it’s hard nonetheless.
oh man. so hard, isn’t it. and i think skyping and seeing all of my family in one room while we’re in a quiet hotel room, makes it harder. while we enjoy the travel, it definitely pulls on the heart! happy holidays! ps. we’ll be in barcelona for new years….if you have any must-do suggestions, please do send them our way. its our first time in the city! so excited.
Annie recently posted…Thankful
I know, the holidays are simultaneously fun and tough!
As far as New Year’s goes, I’ve actually not spent NYE in Barcelona except once where I went to a dinner. I heard this year they were going to have big public parties though! Maybe check the site La Butxaca? It’s in Spanish but it would show you where the parties are going on. But I think pretty much any bar or club will have a good party going on. 🙂
You know I had reverse homesickness for the holidays. I’ve been nostalgic for Spain the last few months. I missed the xmas lights. I missed traveling around to new places for long weekends…even though I’ve been doing my share in California. It’s like what I missed while in Spain, I’m happy to have but I think I missed the act of missing it more than anything. Does that make sense?
I Guess its all apart of the transition. Home has been good to me but I’m not quite settled in just yet…
Lauren @Roamingtheworld recently posted…2013 Travels in Review: Where did the year lead me?
It totally makes sense! I felt like that a lot after coming back from study abroad in Spain, and a lot of my friends have post-Erasmus sadness. It’s hard being torn between two places.